Wednesday, May 26, 2010

stalker

to say i stalk blogs is an understatement.
i seriously check my google reader daily.
sometimes multiple times a day.
oh the joys of having excessive time and
easy access to the internet at work.

this week i went through the backlogs
of one of my favorite blogs.
(i didn't start reading her blog until march
of this year)
now i don't really understand why i am
an avid reader of this blog.
but i just love, love, love it.

maybe i feel like i can relate to her way
of handling rough situations.
i put on a front, i try and make light of
all that's going on.
hell, i even try and find humor in things
that most people would find offensive.
i see these things in her writing.
i feel her pain.

but i am happy to say i feel her joy now.
it's amazing to see the determination and will
power some people maintain no matter how
many curve balls life has thrown at them.

if you have time go and read all of her posts.
from the beginning to the present.
if you have a heart, it will ache, but you'll
laugh and smile all the while.

ashley and mike have two beautiful blessings
in their lives now.
and i know without a doubt that they are eternally
grateful for each. one.

it's amazing what goes into making a family.
love 
pain
tears
devotion
fights
compassion
blood
sweat
doubts
understanding
frustration
loss
faith
trust
time
help
and so so so
much more,
but in the end every part 
(even bad things)
is what makes it right. 

check out their story here.

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

where are you?

so lately i've just sucked at being human.
i've been a lazy worker, if that's even possible at my job.
i've been an absent friend.
i've been a pissy/unfriendly
i've been a lousy blogger.
so basically i just suck!

i still haven't figured out what the "root" to my problem is.
maybe it's the weather.
maybe it's that i suck at what i love.
maybe it's that i'm feeling a little lonely.
maybe it's that i dislike parts of my current situation.
or maybe i just have the attitude of a 5 year old.

i'm trying to be positive.
i'm trying to be the normal me.
i'm not like this,
and i don't like being like this.
hell, i don't understand why if feel like this.
it's really frustrating and confusing.

i guess i'm telling you, dear internet,
in hopes that by finally releasing some
of my frustrations and admitting that i'm really upset.
i can just go back to being me.
i miss me.

any advice is welcome...

Saturday, May 15, 2010

learning


some photos i've been editing today.
just to share.
i'm currently really liking the b/w sharp look.
tell me what you think...












Monday, May 10, 2010

to do before 22...

Well I have made it. I have finally reached the last milestone. I've turned 21. From now on there
are no more birthdays to look forward to. Before you know it I'll be 30...EWW! haha kidding.
I have decide to create a list of things that I want to do before I hit the horrible age of 22.
  • pay off my car. 
  • kiss a cute person in a different country. (or a few countries)
  • get ridiculously good at longboarding.
  • blog about cool things.
  • go back to school. (I really miss it)
  • change a few things.
  • eat healthier. 
  • take a photograph that is worth selling. 
  • start saving for my retirement.
  • cut off my hair. (maybe just an inch or two)
  • learn to cook.
  • enjoy the little things.
  • be daring.
  • read more.
  • be a better person. 
I know it's sort of cliche to say but I don't really feel any older.
I probably look older though
like maybe...
14 now.

Friday, May 7, 2010

NEWBORN!

dear internet,
meet bably girl merkley!

born this morning at 4:27 am.
she weighed 6lbs 10oz.
congrats to cassie and logan.
such a cute baby.
cassie i blame you if i go crazy.
i will miss you at work. :(
i can't wait to finally hold the little goon
and take lots of pictures.
yay for babies!


Thursday, May 6, 2010

wishing!!!

cross all your fingers and your toes!
something wonderful maybe happening. 
i don't want to say much more. 
but i am uber excited. 
and i hoping with all i have that it all works.
it would be a sooooooooo soooo
GREAT!
I will be in need of support no matter if 
the situation goes good or bad. 
if you pray, please pray for me. 
if you don't, send me goodness vibes. 


SOOOO EXCITED!!





Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Must Go - friend edition

This list is a compilation of must go's compliments of my dear friends.


  • Couples that publicly facebook each other with nonsense things such as: I love you more - no I love you more, lets make babies, there's only one thing that has been going through my mind all day and it's you baby. VOMITING! all day. everyday. It's really cool that you love eachother but stop rubbing your happiness in my face.
  • Beagles.
  • Unprofessionalism in the work place.
  • Searching for a new place to live. Probably one of my least favorite things to do.
  • People that ask you a question that leads you to believe that there might be a hangout later. Then you spend all night not really making plans in hopes of chilling with them. And they never get back to you.
  • People that text and when you respond they take hours to reply.
  • Working on days that are sunny and warm. It should be illegal.
the following are from myself
  • movies that just end suddenly, most annoying thing ever. I WANT TO KNOW WHAT HAPPENED!
  • not being able to sleep at night. isomina is a nightmare.
  • fat dogs named monroe laying on my lap at work, causing the lower half of my body to tingle in an unfriendly way.
  • excessive amounts of free-time at work.
  • Doctors that don't show up!!
  • trips that seem to be so far off. July come soon! PLEASE!

Monday, May 3, 2010

Round 2

so ally and i ventured to the energy solutions arena











for another jazz playoff game. 
game 6 against the denver nuggets.

the douchebag next to me was completely
annoyed by my cheering and clapping.
sooooo...
i cheered louder and clapped harder.

and he put earplugs in!











ignore my face in this picture.
i was trying to be that funny looking.

we were sitting in the same section
as last time. but a row behind our former
seats.

the crazy old ladies in wigs were there.
minus one :(
this time i didn't hide to take the picture
but only the one paid attention to me.











of course we won.
i was there.
score 112 vs 104











ally and i went down to the court
we wanted to roll in the sweat
of famous basketball players.
we had a nice girl take a blurry picture
of us.
i asked her to make sure it was blurry.
she succeeded.











was so fun.
we might go to a jazz vs. lakers game.
maybe...