Road Trip!

Road trip weekend!
I have been waiting two whole months for tomorrow to come. The Bolshoi Ballet, I need to say it again, the Bolshoi Ballet, is coming to California. My dancing buddies (Stef, Natalie, and Larissa) and I are venturing out to go view the prima ballerinas we all strive to be.


I'm way too excited for this! 


We leave tomorrow morning and start our long awaited journey to Anaheim. First stop... VEGAS! We stay in the city of sin for one night and will take off early the next morning for the most important destination, Anaheim, California. After the ballet we will head straight to St. George and then back on to Salt Lake where all our lives will resume to normalcy.
If you can't tell I'm super duper excited for this. I can't wait to see the Bolshoi ballerinas live! Aaahhh!!! I'll take lots of pictures! And most likely gush for weeks after about the amazing awesomeness of the ballet.
I <3 ballet!
Can't wait to soak up some sun!

Just another day...

Wow today was crazy at work! After morning appointments, I was in the the surgery room scrubbing a pup for a neuter when I heard a huge crash up front. I ran up there calling my office managers name. I heard nothing but  silence. I didn't see her sitting in the chair; so I walked around the desk and saw her laying spread eagle on the floor. She was out cold, Fell out of the chair!! (one of our computer chairs is evil, there has been a few times that it's slipped out from under me.) Once she came around I did the whole first aid deal with her, she got up and seemed alright.
Later in the day an eldery man shows up for his appointment with his two dogs. One was a 18 year old 100 pound German Shepard the other was a 5 month old pup with two paws missing-actually is the same pup from this past post. I went over to weigh the dogs and I just glanced out the glass doors and noticed a shopping cart.
See here!

I just thought to my self well maybe the dogs just walked along side him. Appointment over the guy took the dogs out, put the little one in the shopping cart which is alright. But then that old man picked up that 100 pound dog and put it in the shopping cart. I just can't imagine what all the drivers that saw him cruising down the street were thinking. I know I would have probably crashed if it was me.
Our vet clinic probably has the most unbalanced, eccentric clients in the valley.

puppy love

3 years ago this precious little pup was my Christmas present; although he didn't come home with me til valentines. oh how i love him! it amazes me that it has been three years already. my little pooch is the best dog on the planet! monroe is an amazing little dog! i wish there was a way to make him live as long as i will.

Here a few pictures of him over the years.

monroe and his buddy gracie. (ignore the ghost in the background- she haunts our home)

things he loves:

lasers

his ball 

(he actually sleeps with it!)

bones

food

jerky & cheese

car rides

me!

He will cuddle with you when you cry.

He can do the moonwalk.     

                                                                                 He can pee...

on you.

He is ALWAYS happy to see you.

I know, I probably sound like a crazy person that just loves her dog too much. 

at least i am not the crazy old lady down the street with 400 cats

But if you ever meet monroe you'll understand,

it's IMPOSSIBLE not to love him. 

So don't judge

<3

tear-filled farewell

internet meet david. my very own personal financial advisor! yes I am only 20 and I have a minimal amount of income, but I am horrible at managing money. I am very poor- like I didn't know this already but thanks for pointing it out david. 
From now on I am going to be a responsible adult who knows how to manage my money. I know it's gross, but sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do. So this my mournful farewell to lean pockets :( , $7 a slice cheese cake (my every person i like hates me vice), and cute shoes. And a dreadful greeting to ramen noodles, sandwiches, and bare feet - kidding.  
In the long run it will be beneficial for me I'll be able to afford my education!!! GO ME! and my dream camera Nikon D90. 
Suck a fat one mumbler!!! (you probably can't even read this!)

body malfunctions

Just recently I really started looking for a second job instead of just thinking about it. I was hired on at a temp agency two weeks ago and have just been ironing out a few details before I actually start working for them. Yesterday I went in for the drug test -which also happens to be the third time I've gone in for the test (which is a completely different story that would probably cause you to  poke your own eyeballs out if you had to read about it). They had explained the procedure to me beforehand and mentioned that someone would be in the bathroom with me. Of course I panicked. I have a super weird thing about people being able to hear me while I pee. Most the time when I have no choice but to use a public restroom, there are plenty of people making excessive amounts of noise, so I don't stress. But this time it was going to be me and just one person, who is waiting no less, for me to urinate. I can't ask her to step out or turn on the faucet because it would seem like questionable behavior.

I went prepared downing 3 large cups of coffee and 2 water bottles right before, that way I would HAVE no alternative but to pee when I got there. Once in my car I really started feeling all caffeine I had practically inhaled. My hands started shaking uncontrollably, I was bouncing in my seat, and on top of all that I wasn't really able to feel my legs from the knees down. How brilliant I am! How about next time I go in for a drug test I don't look like I coming down from last nights hit. I arrived at my destination... could hardly walk because my lower half was tripping out on a caffeine rush, I started stuttering to the receptionist because I was ultra nervous to have someone listen to me relieve my bladder. Mind you I was doing the pee dance, because I swear I have never had to pee that bad in my entire life. I must have looked and sounded like a junkie on the ride down from spectacular high. Finally! I was allowed to follow her into the restroom where I'm pretty sure I snatched that little pee cup out of her hand and ran into the stall. It was as I feared! I could not squeeze a drop from my bladder that was containing more fluid than the Atlantic Ocean. After waiting the longest three minutes of that poor receptionists life, I resorted to pushing on my lower abdomen to force that fluid out of me. I barely had enough to reach that stupid blue line. Test over, I failed -kidding- I drove like a bat out of hell to my other job and peed 20 gallons! 

True Story! Happy Tuesday. 

must go! DRIVING EDITION

Some of these may have appeared on previous must go lists, but I have deemed it necessary for an honorable mention.

• People that don't know how to drive! It's simple, if you are scared to drive, don't know how to drive or are just plain stupid. you should NOT be driving! These are the people that cause about 45% of accidents. If you can't drive walk, ride a bike, or the bus!
• Idiots who think they are so awesome at driving that traffic laws are above them. Weaving in and out of traffic, speeding up to red lights or stop signs, basically reckless drivers. Just because you have a death wish, doesn't mean I do. 
• People that drive in another cars blind spot. Since I now do a lot of freeway driving I see this all the time. Cars coasting along in another cars blind spot. One day you will be hit and I will say "I told you so!"
• When people speed up and pass me, then once you are ahead of me they slow down. If I could I would shoot bolts of lightening with my eyes into the back of your head. 
• Go ahead and never, ever use your blinker! It's a sure fire way of making me forever wish you to the bottom most pit of hell. 
• Forgetting to turn off your blinker. Because the next 10 miles I follow you I will be obsessing over the fact that you aren't turning and your blinker says you are going to. 
• Not going the speed limit. This is highly frustrating for me, more so, when you are in the fast lane. The fast lane is the FAST lane, which means, GO THE SPEED LIMIT OR I WILL RAM YOUR SHINY NEW MERCEDES!
• When it snows and I am driving my cute lil' echo and the GIANT ford F150 decides to ride my ass. It's really cool and all that you have a nice truck with 4-wheel drive, but I can't go any faster in my front wheel drive car. When my car eventually fish tails -which is inevitable- and douche rams his truck into the side of my vehicle there will be hell to pay!
• People who take up two spaces to park. If you don't want to damage your precious little car don't effing drive it. It's far more dangerous to be driving it then parking in a single space. 
• Unnecessary use of high beams. Temporary blindness while driving is definitely a safety hazard. 
• When people stop at a stop sign and wait nearly 10 whole minutes before slowly creeping across the intersection. The sign never turns green so stop waiting for the impossible. 
• Motorcycles that weave through traffic. Just because you can fit your skinny-assed bike in-between two lanes of traffic doesn't make it legal and definitely warrants you a complete idiot with a death wish.
• When people slow down to see what happened when there are flashing lights. Honestly, I usually have a destination when I am driving. If you want to see someone get a ticket, watch cops.
• The guy who spit on my car! NOT COOL YOU ROYAL DOUCHE BAG!
• People that ride their brakes. I find it highly annoying, it's hard to tell if you are really braking. 
• When I use my blinker to get over into the other lane and the next 6 cars ride bumper to bumper refusing to let me over. I'm not joking, when I turn my blinker on I would like to get over. 
• Speeding up when I am trying to pass you. The entire time I was behind you, you were comfortable going your own speed... I wasn't. Douche!
• Tailgating. I don't need you up my ass to know you are annoying... back off!

Pleasant driving to you all. 

dr. manhattan VS. edward cullen

Superhero vs. Wanna-be-superhero.

so i have nothing really to blog about as of late. so i have resourced myself to creating a new fantastic post about why dr. manhattan would totally demolish edward cullen in a battle. now i know that a lot of insane people will disagree with me but that's because they have been brainwashed by all this vampire nonsense! i understand that they are both fictional characters but that puts them on a level playing field.

dr. manhattan pros :

practically a god, need i say more?

edward cullen pros :

reads minds, hard as a rock, super fast.

dr. manhattan cons :

can over look the meaning of life.

edward cullen cons :

can die!

pretty much that explains it all. dr. manhattan would simply have to control the elements of the world and create a fire that would burn poor edward cullen to ashes. tall, dreamy edward wouldn't even have time to think about running. his lightening fast reflexes would be no match for the blue man. in fact, dr. manhattan could probably run out for coffee, slay silk-spectre, work on a complex giant sphere, and kill edward all at the same time. the joys of being able to be in more than one place at the same time.
so i have come to the conclusion that i should invest in a t-shirt sporting "team manhattan" because who really wants to rock "team edward"

one giant run on... but it's a memory that's how they work

i apologize to anyone that attempts to read this... i know i am seriously far from being grammatically correct in any post but this one is horrid. i am in the process of reminiscence, while typing and therefore, i have an excuse this time. my memories all come to me like one giant run-on sentence. there is no pause from the end of one memory to the beginning of another. so bare with me while i remember my childhood home.
so while sitting here on my lunch hour i'm trying to think of something to distract me from other hideous thoughts that i shall not speak of. i'm currently plopped over the heat vent in my parents old home, eating a frosty watching carlos- my brothers cat- groom his ass! it's crazy to think that in a short while this home will be for sale and i no longer will be allowed to place my bony little ass on this very heat vent. the house i was raised in, the house of my childhood... will one day soon be inhabited by a new family. all the memories this place holds is amazing! walking into the bedroom i slept in for 19 years i remember crawling under the bed and drawing with my crayons on the plywood, getting 20 dollars from the tooth fairy, lighting bottle rockets - that back fired- out my window. going into my parents room i recollect finding out about santa, playing king of the bed with my father, my mom pulling my baby teeth. the bathroom i almost see myself sitting in the sink getting ready for a performance, watching my mom do her makeup and my dad shave. the hallway where i laid the nights i was sick, where i'd put the two closet doors together with a hair tie so dean couldn't get in, the hallway where i'd try to climb to the ceiling. oh the kitchen... where dean and i almost burned the house down and tried desperately to vacuum up all the evidence before mom came home (a mental image for you all -dean and i running around frantically with bandanas over our ashen faces, the shop vac sucking up the pillows of black smoke and ash), all the cakes i made but never ate, dancing in my daddys arms my little feet on top of his, doing dishes with my mom splashing water all about, lighting flowers in the kitchen sink because i couldn't wait for fireworks. i wander into the living room i see christmas morning, dancing on the coffee table, jumping on the couches, building elaborate forts the size of the livingroom. watching movies, playing games, seeing my dad sitting on the couch home from the hosptial. the top of the stairs where my mom put on her shoes every morning; where kelly, moe and monroe all greated me after a long day at school; all the times i fell down those stairs and the equal amount of times i fell up those stairs. the basement where i hopped down and there was water to my ankles after i accidentally flooded it. the fish room where i see my dad getting ready for the annual hunting/camping trip, the 4 am mornings i watched him gather all the poles to go ice fishing or boating. the computer room where i spent way too many hours playing roller coaster tycoon and the siims. the backyard with my secret hideout under the porch, that later became the clubhouse of deans (i wasn't cool enough to be in the club). the swing set where i spent countless hours swinging my little heart away.the front yard where i made up dance routines, flew my kite with a fishing pole, climbed the tree and was too scared to climb down.  
all these lovely memories flood into my mind as i walk through my old home. even though i haven't lived there for awhile it was still my home. it will be a sad day when that home sales. it will forever have the memories of my childhood, i hope that the next family to live there will fill it with more happiness, laughter, and love.

MUST GO

fake laughs or forced laughs. if you don't think i am funny i don't care, just don't pretend you think i am. 
people that don't close a door that clearly says please keep the door closed. it's surprising how unobservant most people are.
the word bathroom. we should say "loo" like the British, it sounds more sophisticated. Plus, it flows more naturally out of your mouth.
when you are reading in a public place and someone interrupts you to chit-chat. you clearly hint you'd much rather continue reading then carry on this lame conversation. yet, they continue you to talk to you like you care. maybe i'm a cold bitch, that just needs a lesson in being friendly. but i really think it's them that needs a lesson in common courtesy. i'm reading a book, not sitting at a social meet and greet.
working saturday nights. or atleast having to dress "professionally" on a saturday night. if i have to sit for hours i'd enjoy uncrossing my legs for a while.
people that have 100 bumper stickers on their car. i never have enough time to read them all.
pot holes. i pay my taxes, now fix the damn road!
when it is clearly obvious and people still ask "did you get a hair cut?" of course i did... it didn't grow back into my scalp.
the term chicken fingers. they are chicken strips! chickens don't have fingers.
automated phone answering systems for banks, the pharmacy, etc. they are nothing more than an inconvience. hire a human to answer the phones.

stunna shades. they serve absolutely no purpose. well except to make a public announcement that you are a complete idiot. that you enjoy wasting money on items that can't possibly do anything but obstruct your vision. it's probably why you thought you looked good. 

fake leather baseball caps. as a matter of fact, leather baseball caps. leather is just for jackets, motor bike chaps, purses, and wallets. anything else is just going to look horrid!